Update for last two weeks.

When I started my food journey, I didn’t really think about the difficulties that would come spending two weeks away from my normal routine to go home for spring break and go on an adventure in the Pacific Northwest.  I began to feel vaguely guilty because I couldn’t think of any way to maintain a $20 a week grocery goal under such conditions.  I talked to some friends and my mom and decided to just do my best to be food-conscious, to resist the urge to indulge every small pang of hunger, and to keep track of everything.  And, of course, I didn’t want to be cheap.

Being cheap would be letting my good friend Grace in Seattle supply all of my food while I stayed with her (as hard as I tried to avoid it, she still supplied most of it).  Being cheap would involve avoiding social events at the conference that would involve going out to eat, or making my lent resolution public so that people would give me leftovers.  I tried to avoid all these things.

Here’s how I did:

The travel day: I brought lots of snacks from home so I’d be set all day long.  Because of the time change, I arrived at my hotel in Portland around 6:00 at night and still felt like I had time to go to a nearby Safeway to get groceries for the week.

Total at the store: $16.00, spent on sandwich materials, microwavable soups and fresh fruit.

The conference in Portland: I ate my groceries, made the unlimited free coffee in my hotel room rather than buying the expensive kind downstairs, and did not feel appreciably more hungry than I normally am.  I did go out to eat once with colleagues.  Though I only got an entrée, it still cost me $12 with tip, so as you can see I was about $8 over my weekly goal.  I also went to the conference banquet, which I had paid for several months ago so I didn’t really count it.  But I did appreciate that the banquet had cost me $35.00.  The banquet and the other dinner seemed necessary to me, though, purely for the social aspect.  I enjoyed them and was okay with spending the money within reason.

Visiting Grace in Seattle: I resolved to be less thrifty around Grace.  She knew about my resolution but I tried to make it very clear to her that it was okay if we went out to eat and that I wouldn’t worry about my spending habits too much.  Before we left Portland, I got a $4.00 sandwich from a food cart and a $2.00 cup of coffee from Stumptown (and I will have to say it was one of the best coffees I’ve ever had – maybe just because I was comparing it to the hotel stuff).  We took the bus to Seattle and got home pretty late, so Grace just cooked up some chicken and frozen vegetables for our dinner and we went straight to bed.

I love Grace because she is so generous.  We went grocery shopping and she insisted on buying the food.  Then she cooked me delicious meals.  She also bought my dinner one night when we went out to eat.  For the most part, we didn’t go out to eat, but that isn’t to say we didn’t eat well.  We had plenty of portable snacks for our adventures and the anticipation of savory, hearty meals when we returned.  The only things I actually bought for direct consumption were: another couple cups of coffee ($3.00 total, and can you see what holds the keys to my heart?  Maybe that’s what I should give up next), a bowl of salmon chowder ($5.00-ish?  I paid with cash), and a ridiculously tiny, adorable fruit tart ($2.00).

But does it matter?  Sure, I met my goal for the week, but only because most of my food needs were supplied by someone else.  I guess that brings me to my main point:

My $20 a week grocery resolution has not taught me what it means to be hungry, like I originally intended.  Instead, it has allowed me to experience the generosity of my friends and family and get really good at doing math.

Huh.

Yes, I got hungry for sure.  My hunger was never terrible or debilitating though.  The biggest thing with living by the generosity of others is you don’t get to make the decisions about when, where and what to eat, which I did find very humbling and a little disconcerting.  But Grace always made sure I was well fed and I just had to trust her.

What if God treats me the same way, giving me what I need to be satisfied, not more or less?  Why do I have such a hard time appreciating that?  Why must I always be in control?

Only two more weeks to go.

Weekly Update #1

So, last week was not hard at all.  I had leftovers and 3 potluck dinners (which I did buy extra food to contribute to; I am trying my best not to be “cheap,” just frugal).  This week, though, I will only have one free dinner so it’s more of a challenge.  However, I was amazed at what I managed to buy at Kroger on Monday for a total of $20.27.

2 lb. ground turkey - $1.99 each

1 packet chili seasonings - $0.69

2 apples – $1.67

6 bananas – $0.87

1 lb. grapes - $2.01

2 bags frozen veggies - $1.00 each

1 can diced tomatoes - $0.67

½ gallon milk - $2.19

1 personal pizza (a Friday night treat!) - $1.34

1 can pasta sauce - $0.88

1 box whole grain noodles – $0.99

1 box granola bars (for breakfast) - $2.39

I’ll be using 1 lb. of the turkey to make chili (with all those beans I bought last week lol) and 1 lb. to make meatballs.

I am amazed because it seems like so much.  Safe, healthy food is so bountiful and cheap where I live.

This is not true for most places in the world.

I’ve been reading Kisses from Katie, the amazing story of a woman from Tennessee, about my age, who has become an adoptive mother of 13 girls in Uganda.  This book was highly recommended to me by a dear friend and fellow counselor from Camp Chestnut Ridge, and when I found out that another friend was reading it here in Athens, I asked to borrow it when she was finished.

Katie Davis inspires me, in the way she loves others and in the way she loves Jesus.  I don’t want my Lenten journey to just be for me: to just be about a feeling of solidarity and frugality.  I want to actually use my sacrifice (if you can call it that!) to help someone.  This week I’m going to donate the $20 I didn’t spend to her ministry, Amazima.  It’s not much, but in Uganda it can go far in feeding a hungry child.

Check out Katie's story!

http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/

Food for thought in the stable of thoughts.

I’m doing something a little different for lent this year.  I’m not giving up chocolate or candy or coke.  Yet I may find myself eating these things very rarely in the next couple months.

Why?  Because I’m giving up my $40 plus-a-week grocery bill and all the luxuries that it entails.  Cutting my food purchases down to $20 a week, I hope to develop an appreciation and thankfulness for the simple feeling of having a full belly.

See, I have been a slave to tasty food for as long as I can remember.  While it certainly isn’t a sin to enjoy food, I depend on it for my happiness waaaaaay too much.  And because the US of A has bountiful food options and I have been blessed with the resources to acquire them, I often take for granted the expensive groceries I buy and justify their purchase as necessary objects to “get me through the week.”

How can I live without them?

Maybe I will live with more awareness of hunger, more empathy towards the poor and needy, more enjoyment on the rare occasions when I experience flavorful food.

Maybe I will live with less gluttony, less inclination to mindlessly stuff my face with calories to escape my problems.

Time can only tell.  I have already done my shopping for this week, and the receipt holds the evidence.  This is an “easy” week.  I still have lots of food stockpiled from last week, including Valentine’s Day candy.  Pray for my sanity as a start this journey!  It will not be easy for a food-lover like me.

Shopping List Week 1

1 lb black beans

1 lb red beans

1 bunch of spinach

6 apples

1 bunch of bananas

2 lb whole grain rice

1 orange pepper

1 gallon milk

Mid-Summer Reflection

I realize I haven’t exactly met my weekly quota for blogging while at camp.  It’s too hard.  I forgot that the daily work of camp is life-consuming, and the little extra free time that you do have is spent having normal adult conversations and hang-out time with your co-workers.

I think I got this tired last year, but I can’t remember if I got this mentally and emotionally frustrated.  I think it’s because it’s my second consecutive year at the same camp.  Today I put my thoughts into words for a fellow counselor, and I realized while explaining my feelings to her that I am disappointed in what this summer has been like.  I expected to see change in the returning campers, not to mention change in myself and the rest of the staff.  Instead, everything seems dead and stagnant.  I notice selfishness a lot these days, in other people and myself.  I have trouble seeing Christ work through anyone.

           

This week I wasn’t sure if I could make it.  But it’s Friday, and I did.  Even though I reacted with pessimism and a cynical attitude, God still sent blessings my way.   He sends them in the form of the positive attitudes of other people.

One of our New Zealand counselors told us at a staff meeting that she’s so happy to be here, that she’s not homesick yet like Camp America said she should be and that she’s having the time of her life.  I knew her week wasn’t perfect by any means, but just that she could say that…it was uplifting.

The morning skits and the talent show were hilarious this week.  I’m so grateful that some of the staff can keep a sense of humor throughout this chaos.

I had good, deep conversations with several of my friends/coworkers this week.  Those are always the greatest blessing of all.  Some people directly encouraged me about my situation in life, others encouraged me through their general attitude of optimism and joy.

A few days ago I was hopeless.  I was at the end of my rope, and almost wondered if I should just drive away on my night off and never come back.

Regardless of my feelings, my Dad in Heaven takes care of me, using other people.  I can never forget that.

A full week of camp has already past and I have more than enough to write about.  For those who aren’t familiar with how this works, all forty-some counselors go through an intensive 24/7 two-week staff training where we live, work and play together.  We’ve already learned how to facilitate some activities such as the high ropes course, archery, and the pool party that goes down every Sunday night when kids first arrive at camp.  It has been crazy and fun and exhausting. 

My stomach was tied up in knots when I was about an hour from camp last Sunday.  I constantly battle the lie that no one really likes me, and after having not seen these people for a year (as well as the prospect of meeting new staff), I was terrified at the thought that I wouldn’t get a warm welcome.  I shouldn’t have been afraid.  I was greeted with excited hugs and smiles and questions about vet school.  Friendship has never come easy to me but I feel like I’ve been getting better, and I can honestly say that with both old and new staff I have made good first steps to genuine, deep friendship.  This past week at camp has affirmed that I’m growing and changing, and it’s so important.  In fact, I talked to one of my college friends (whom I will call “Disney”) tonight, and she told me that I seem so different – a lot more confident and better at communicating with people.

Our camp director gave us bags with this quote attached to them:

“We need holy friendships with people who are willing to challenge the sins we’ve come to love, affirm the gifts we’re afraid to claim, and dream the dreams we would not otherwise have dreamed.”  I don’t know who said it, but it’s so true.  I hope it happens this summer, because I feel like I can only give the kids what they need and deserve if my tank is full.

I know it will be a struggle, something that I must meet each day with courage and prayer.  It’s terrifically easy to believe no one cares about you and to dissolve into hopelessness.  It’s much harder to be hopeful and honest.  Something that can help are “Ebenezers.”  One of the camp chaplains gave us a talk about them the other day.  Ebenezer means “rock of help,” and the Israelites set up rocks at specific places to remind themselves of something amazing God had done for them.  We have Ebenezers of our own – a specific place, a gift from a friend – something tangible and physical that reminds us of an act of God.  I’ll be looking for Ebenezers at camp this summer and sharing some of them with you.

And now, some pictures from the camp farm for your enjoyment!

Bovine Encounters and Falconry

My roommate Jen and her fiance, Jason, have amazing hobbies -- one of which is falconry. I got to see them hunt the bird last weekend (Their dog Sierra also was a part of the hunt). Warning before I even start, the bird was everywhere so I didn't get any amazing photos. I was instructed to turn around and cover my face with my hands if she attacked me (which was apparently a very real possibility). So, I had to measure the pros and cons of being mauled by a hawk with or without my precious camera.

We took off through the woods, Jason yelling commands which I'm afraid I didn't understand; but the bird did. When he saw a squirrel, Jason would shake vines on the tree it was in and shout something that sounded like "Hyahyahya!!" which apparently meant both to hawk and dog "KILL IT!" The bird went crazy, the dog went crazy, and the squirrel ran for its life.
Sierra would wait under the tree -- if the squirrel headed down near the ground she'd try to get it.
Once Autumn got ahold of the squirrel, it was all over in the blink of an eye. At one point, she caught a squirrel in its nest and refused to return to Jason, instead eating it fifty feet up in a tree (smart bird). Sierra, Jen and I wandered off while Jason watched Autumn finish her meal.
We met some cows, who were curious about us and would follow us when our backs were turned but suspiciously stopped when we glanced back.


Look! A cow skull. See how there's no upper incisors? (oooooh vet school)

Some snapshots of my Christmas:

I started the holidays in Santa's workshop making some presents.

Yip, yip, Appa!

Left my school house.

Enjoyed seeing our living room get the present it has always dreamed of: a Christmas tree of special magnificence.


Woke up to a beautiful Christmas morning (though this technically wasn't that morning; had to fit this photo in somewhere).

Read The Lord of the Rings by the fire.

In all, a pretty good break.